For the Unquiet Mind

If you’re one of those folks whose mind seems to ‘take off’ sometimes (or a lot of the time) like a six year old on a sugar high, well, you’re not alone. This can be no laughing matter, especially when you’re trying to focus, concentrate, or fall asleep…. Racing thoughts are usually connected to one kind of anxiousness or another, so a multi-dimensional approach seems to be called for – strategies to slow and calm the thoughts themselves, some global anxiety reduction, and reorientation to the here and now. Below are some ideas, borrowed and new, that might help reduce the sometimes paralyzing power of a mind spinning out of control.

Thought stopping: If your mind and thoughts are getting the best of you, one deceivingly simple yet effective solution is to say to yourself: “Stop!” Try different versions: “Stop! That’s enough! Let it go!” etc. You can say it in your head or out loud, whatever works. Try repeating the ones that work: “Let it go. Just let it go.” Be firm but kind with yourself – talk to yourself like a loving parent. Look for improvement, not perfection – each time you stop or reduce disruptive thoughts, you’re taking away some of their power and intrusiveness.

Positive self talk: If your mind gets stuck on negative thoughts or feelings, remind yourself of the whole picture, for instance: “Things are tough right now, but I’m doing alright.” This is not ignoring reality; it’s seeing the bigger picture. Try different statements, see what feels ‘right.’ Be specific – what exactly is going well or acceptably well in your life? Negative thoughts can be highly exaggerated – if you’re thinking “always,” “never,” or “should,” there are almost always exceptions: “I don’t always miss my exit. It just feels that way.” Again, be your own ‘loving parent’, that is, patient and persistent.

Mindful breathing/body awareness: Try this anytime, anywhere, especially when your mind is starting to take off. Bring your attention to your breath: feel it going in,  and going out. Just notice how it feels, how it sounds. When your mind wanders, that’s ok – just gently bring your attention back to your breath. Try for one minute, or even thirty seconds. Also, try noticing some part of your body – the hands and feet are especially good for this. Just notice your body – direct your attention to the palms of your hands, the soles of your feet, and just notice them. When your mind takes off, that’s ok – gently return your attention to your body. Try for thirty seconds, or a minute. As always, patient, forgiving persistence is the key.

Moment-to-moment awareness of daily activity: Pay mindful attention to everyday activities. For instance, if you’re washing dishes or taking a shower, notice the feel and sound of the water, the movement of your hands, the heat, the feel of the soap…. When your mind wanders, and it will, just notice this, then gently bring your attention back to noticing the task. Try this with several ordinary daily activities – chopping vegetables, making and drinking coffee, etc. Notice if any ‘work’ better than others. Try for one minute, or longer if you want.

Do something physical every day: In particular, exercise outdoors in a natural setting – walk through a park, hike, bike, or run a trail, go swimming outdoors, walk around the neighborhood… Any exercise, however, is better than none. Whether indoors or out, work towards being physically tired. Try different things until you figure out what works best for you.

Pay attention to positive changes: No matter how small. Congratulate yourself for following through, and forgive yourself for not meeting all your expectations. When you fall short, think about what you’ve learned – and try again. And as always, patience, persistence, and self forgiveness are key.